Monday, February 5, 2018

Thanks Athleta

Mid-December I banned myself from purchasing any clothing for myself until March 1st.

I had found that I was purchasing something new any time I saw something I liked, when I felt bored, or felt that I "deserved," it.

As it turns out I am VERY good at rewarding myself.  I always believe I am deserving.

No self esteem issues here.

I did realize this was unhealthy for me emotionally and financially though so I instituted the ban.

So far I've only broken the ban to purchase a shirt before my barre class because I had worn long sleeves to class by accident, and I'm not committed to any cause enough to exercise in long sleeves and pass out from heat stroke.

Overall I'm super proud of myself.

Almost so proud that I feel I deserve a new outfit, but I feel that might be wrong.

Stella has been sick since last Wednesday with off and on fever.  It's made for a lot of at home time for me.  I have read a lot, sulked a bit, and finished watching The Mindy Project on Hulu.

If you aren't aware, commercials play during TV shows on Hulu unless you purchase a more pricey plan.  It's strange to be subjected to commercials in 2018 outside of the Super Bowl, but I survived.

As I was watching one of the last episodes in the series, an Athleta commercial aired.  I usually read during the commercials, but I love Athleta so it caught my attention.  They were marketing their new Up For Anything line and the entire idea of the ad is that some every day women show up to try on the tights/shirts/bras and are then surprised by being asked to do all sorts of out-of-their-comfort-zone activities in the new apparel.

These women were given the chance to do trapeze work and other such exciting endeavors that look terrifying to me. I currently still get psyched that I can do the splits, I don't needs to hang from a swinging bar in the sky to feel like my athletic apparel is amazing.

I was mesmerized though.  These women were afraid and hesitant and insecure about the challenges they were given, as they should be in my opinion.  I'm confident I would have been out.

I watched them try though, and then watched them be moved to tears at the realization that they were far more capable than they thought they were. They found success in these crazy stunts that I am confident I would never be interested in attempting.  They were crying with disbelief as they faced their fears and realized that they really could do so much more than they ever had given themselves permission to believe.

I found myself sobbing at the Athleta commercial and cheering for these ladies.

And desperately wanting some new tights.

That is some amazing marketing.

(My Athleta cart currently has $505.00 of merchandise in it just waiting for March 1st.  Well played Athleta.)

Since turning 40 I am trying to find new ways to challenge myself because I think I am capable of more than what I am currently doing.  The every day in and out of mothering four children lacks a certain excitement I always had associated with my abilities.

Surprisingly, none of my kids find me witty or interesting.

I have big dreams and goals, but mostly I find myself trying to figure out what to make for dinner, how to wash 6 people's clothes and have a couch free of clean clothes a few days a week, and plotting new iPad/xbox regulations.

These tasks are not part of my dreams. These tasks are my life though.

There is value here.  There is worth here.

That laundry is important work....though I might be much more empowered by it if I were wearing some of those new tights.