"What's the 411?"
If you don't, I assume you were either extremely uncool several years back, or you lived outside the United States and this expression makes no sense because you are foreign...which makes you either really cool or weird.
Should this be an entire blog about expressions that no one really uses anymore and why?
Fine. Here's 6 quick things.
(Because when I tried to type 411 it just got long and stupid. Alright, stupid-er.)
1. I have developed a serious condition of addiction to Sons of Anarchy. I know I've mentioned it before, but things have escalated. I'm contemplating a purchase of leather chaps and a reaper tattoo on my back. If you think that sounds extreme then you haven't seen enough of the show. Alex and I are logging two episodes a night and feel we are much better people because of it.
Fine, we aren't better people, but I feel so much more informed on gun running, motorcycle clubs, and the turmoil of good versus evil and how this can exist within one person on multiple levels and that has to count for something.
Fine, and I also learned that I totally can dig a guy with greasy-ish hair, lots of tattoos, and has a tendency to off people he doesn't like. He's spectacular.
Watch it people. It's beyond good.
2. I colored my own hair again and picked a shade entirely too dark. This isn't much more to say about this, but it's on my mind right now. I feel as though I look sort of foreign, but it's possible I look like the weird variety rather than the cool one. Like perhaps I've decided I no longer like cold beverages or matching clothes.
Are those universal traits of foreigners? They are in my head so that seems like it should count.
|Black hair, it feels weird|
I'm so ashamed.
I also almost clicked on a link to what I believe was a timeline in photos of Jessica Simpson's body evolution. I'm apparently completely without any morals now.
I blame my hair coloring.
4. I have eaten a s'more almost every night since I arrived at my parents' house. I feel gluttonous about this, but also feel that it's arguable by the fact that it's a s'more. Aren't these the pinnacle of desserts?
|Stella just likes the marshmallows|
5. Is anyone else feeling totally enticed by all JC Penny's (JCP if you're hip, Penny's if your old,)recent marketing? I mean, the catchy tune, the bright jeans, that adorable tiny green car?
Now if only I knew a child that needed a free haircut they are giving away this month...
Yeah, I'm making an appointment tomorrow.
He's starting to look like that guy from Sons of Anarchy. He's probably already working on a gun running scheme and plotting to hurt people that hurt my feelings. He needs a tattoo ASAP.
6. I took my boys to a public pool today and all they wanted to do was play with me. I feel like they don't even know me. I do not want to play in the pool, that's not who I am. That's their father's job. I enjoy watching from a safe distance and complaining about splashing.
I'm fun in my own way.
I discovered man that looked a lot like a boy I had a crush on in high school, but significantly more tan. I spent the first half of our time at the pool trying to figure out if it was actually him, and then how he got so tan. I felt genuine concern that a man that tan is surely not employed, possibly even afflicted with the tragic tanorexic problem that I think usually strikes women.
It wasn't him. After that I had even less enthusiasm for the pool.
Am I the only Mom that doesn't want to "play" in the pool?
Could this be a result of too much violent TV and hair color?
Can men be tanorexic?