Monday, August 1, 2011

Oh To Be A Mom That Just Doesn't Care

I recently tweeted:

"Sometimes I wish I just didn't give a shit, it would make this whole parenting thing much easier."

My friend Scott asked me what I would do if I didn't give a shit? 

It got me thinking, what would I do differently?  So I put together a little list.  

You are welcome.

  1. What prompted the tweet: I would stand idly by when my kids take over the hook and ring game outside the local burger joint and don't let any other kids have a turn.  I'd drink my beer and allow them to just be rude to everyone else.  I might even belch loudly while doing it, or consume three more beers after my first.
  2. I would always give in, right away.
  3. I'd serve chicken nuggets, peanut butter and jelly, pizza and hamburgers every night and never think twice about exposing them to healthy food or a balanced diet.  It would save me hours.
  4. I would completely ignore nap times and all that they restrict.
  5. I would never, ever put down my iphone.
  6. I would never, ever, ever schedule another play date again, or visit Chuck E Cheese.
  7. I'd drink at lunch more often.
  8. I would never spend $10 on another Brain Quest book or Star Wars figure for my children.
  9. I would be 100% comfortable with the boys peeing in the front yard or  friend's Koi ponds.
  10. I would watch The Bachelorette while my children eat a dinner of Popsicles and bread  and butter and ask me important  life questions that I promptly ignore because I need to focus on the intricate details of JP and Ashley.
Fine, I did number 10 tonight....we all have our low moments.

But for the record, I very much do give a shit, which makes the role of raising my kids all that much more difficult...and all that much more rewarding.


WhisperingWriter said...

Ugh. I hear you on the Chuck E Cheese thing. I abhor it but the kids love it, therefore I force myself to go.

The pizza is good at least.

And I do rock at Skee ball. That's if my four year old lets me play. Most of the time she takes my balls from me and loses.

Lynda Halliger-Otvos said...

LOL !~! Your list sounds like most of the moms I knew in that southern state. Especially the one about letting your kids monopolize the play equipment--happened every damn day.

And since when is PBJ not dinner ?~! Your standards are impossibly high.

Jennifer said...

Your list reads like a fantasy :)

lcarp51 said...

Um. I thought pizza, hamburgers, and chicken nuggets WERE healthy food. Dang.

Kimberly said...

I'm already dreading my first Chuck E. Cheese visit as a mother. Hopefully we've still got a few more years on that one...

And I really liked the line about letting your kids hog a game without sharing... Trinity tried to do this a couple of months ago at the zoo (the first and only time she's ever gotten into a disagreement with any child other than Gabe), and after she pushed the older child, Josh grabbed her, carried her away from the exhibit, and made her sit in time out until she apologized. It would've been so much easier if we just didn't care!

Big D and Me said...

I wrote about that same thing today (sort of). If my children broke something in the store, I would just walk away and leave the broken item. But I'm convinced if I do that my kids will lead a lie of crime. It would be so much easier not to care.

Shell said...

It does make it harder, when we care.

Though, my boys do tend to pee in the backyard. SIGH.

lcarp51 said...

I'm not sure why, but after reading this I really, really wanted to send you a post I just wrote about Uniqua. Because I knew you would understand. I hope you understand...sorry.