Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Eight Blissful Years

I can't believe it has been eight years.   Alex and I got married eight years ago and it feels like a lifetime ago and like yesterday, if that is possible.  I was looking back at our wedding album with the kids, trying to explain why today is a special day, and surprisingly they really did not care and were more concerned about why we aren't having cake if an anniversary is the birthday of our marriage.  I, however, found it fascinating.

I probably haven't taken that album out in over a year, but I've looked at it a thousand times.  Each time I turn the pages I see something different.  Today was a combination of several things. 

First, I made some poor visual choices with the flowers and bridesmaid dresses. Second, cake cutting photos are pretty cheesy and ridiculous. Did I even eat any of that cake? Finally, how in the hell did we end up getting married...and making it work?  We look like we are 18 in those photos.

I feel a very strong longing for my former waistline and seemingly less spotty skin coloring, I look extremely youthful in general in those photos.  Alex looks like he could have just dropped by after his chem lab before hitting the bars. What were we doing getting married that young?  I recall asking my father if he thought I was too young to be getting married while he was walking me down the aisle, (yes this probably was a question better asked earlier than that moment, but that's when I thought of it.)  He told me no, everything was going to be fine.  Turns out, as usual, he was right. 

We were young and things haven't always been super fun, but I would like to tell my younger, smoother skin, self that things are just going to get better and better.  I am often struck by how in love I thought I was when Alex and I got married, because it feels like nothing in comparison to how I feel about him now.  After eight years, three kids and a dog, he is more amazing to me by far than he was that day.  I mean, he really is much more fantastic than I knew.

He's still very attractive, that hasn't changed at all.  Well, actually I think he looks even better than when we got married.  Why is it that guys can get better looking with age and we just get more spots and sags?  Oh well, at least he hasn't been comparing me to my former self recently...that I am aware of that is.  Even though it is annoying to be told "how lucky" I am to be married to Alex by random admiring women, he never once makes me feel like it is anything but the other way around, like he's the one that lucked out. 

He's an excellent father, which he thankfully was not when we got married.  He loves his children unconditionally.  He finds wonder and amusement in them. He is often much better than I am at accepting them as they are rather than working on changing their innate qualities.  He is equally good at being the stern Daddy and the gentle comforter.  He finds teachable moments and has patience (that I usually do not have) for explaining and explaining and explaining.  They think he's the greatest thing to have ever entered their lives...and they are probably right, except that I'm awesome too. (They'll realize it soon too, I'm sure.)

He is a ridiculously hard worker.  This quality has proven to be one of my favorite and least favorite qualities.  He works long, hard days to do a good job so he can provide for us.  I love this because I admire his determination and his commitment to do his best at a job, no matter what.  I hate this because it means he misses out on a lot of moments with me and with our kids.  It also means that I almost always do dinner and bedtime for all three kids by myself which is very, very bad.  I must say though, I much prefer hard working Alex to a slacker husband that sits on the couch, drinks beer and worries about his fantasy football team.  Oh, and there is nothing more attractive (or on my low days, annoying) than Alex in a suit...very professional, hard-worker looking and it makes me weak.

After 8 years of marriage I still get excited when I hear him come through the door.  He always kisses me before doing anything else and always makes me feel like he's been waiting all day to do that...even when I am a raging bitch after a difficult day with the children and I can't think of a single reason why anyone would want to kiss me.  I still have butterflies in my stomach when I see him looking for me in a crowd and I can see his face light up when he sees me like he's found exactly what he wanted to find...and I am so grateful that it is me.  I also still feel intimidated and a little excited when he tries to argue about the most mundane things on earth.   Seriously, his Greek arguing skills are not challenged by me at all due to my lack of confrontational skills, but I love watching him get fired up about ridiculous things like how we organize the junk drawer or the angle of our shoe mould.  It's simply crazy. He's the most honest man on Earth and I love that quality because I never have to guess about what's going on...mind-reading should always be absent from a marriage.  He is wonderful.

So,there are several things I would change about the details of my wedding.  I would change things like the flowers in my bouquet, the bridesmaid dresses, my earrings...but I am so happy I don't have to plan a wedding again.  I couldn't care less about all those details and I'm mainly just happy that I still feel nuts for the guy standing next to me in all the photos.

I am blessed.  I am in love.  I am Mrs. Dadidakis.


Sabra said...

Oh- I am slightly teary and laughing. Thanks! And why is my word verification, "dammix"?

Anonymous said...

LOVED this, Leslie. I myself am celebrating my 9-year anniversary today!
-Laura S

Laura Haehl said...

Leslie! That was beautiful! I am so glad you decided to write that. It can give all us single ladies something to for which to strive!