Sunday, September 19, 2010

I'll Just Build A Wall Around Them

A few weeks ago Alex came home to find me extremely sad and frustrated.  Now, this is not all that unusual because he often arrives home just after I have put the kids to bed and the rage I usually feel during the 5:00 pm to 7:00 pm hours is often still lingering when he walks in the door.  On most evenings any frustration I feel is probably amplified by me seeing him.  He looks like a walking reminder of how the rest of the world has not spent the day using the bathroom with 2 or 3 other people watching and asking questions or negotiating with small humans about why they have to do things like wear pants.  But this night was a little different, I was in tears of frustration, not anger.  I felt like I couldn't get away from the kids. I felt trapped in my own house by their noise, their mess, their presence, in every inch of space in our home. Within 20 minutes of talking, he had a plan. We'd build a wall around our current office "area" and make a playroom. He'd call the framer in the morning and have them out in a few days.

First thought, ummm....I should be crying more about a range of topics if I my concerns are going to be remedied with action this quickly.  I could also feel very sad about my lack of well fitting, designer jeans or those amazing club chairs I saw in Z Gallerie.  Second thought, I married a genius, a wall around my kids and all their stuff...will it have a lock?

As with most things I feel fantastically excited about, I received a whole slew of commentary from nay-sayers about the new room.   Why must people attempt to warn me about the pitfalls of my joyful plans?  Many people said it wouldn't help with the mess. Some said my kids would still want to be where I am so they wouldn't play in it...you clearly don't witness how cranky I can be with my kids, I'm not sure they really like me that much.  I even heard that it would be more difficult to manage them because they would not be in my line of vision or within ear shot all the time.  Well yes...yes, that's the whole magic of the walled room. 

Now, less than two weeks later I am happy to report that the walls are up and all we are waiting on is the door to be installed and the room to be painted. For the most part this room is a fully functioning playroom, no longer just a play "area." It is a disastrous mess, that I don't have to walk through or stare at while I function in my house all day.  The boys have set up all their army men and super heroes and spend hours playing in there.  Whole fights have broken out and been resolved without me even realizing they were happening or requiring my assistance...which they didn't I suppose.

Right now I am sitting about 20 feet from them but I feel as though we each have our own space.  I can eat breakfast and think about my own life (oh-no!) without getting involved in what Batman is using to fight off the pirate....see I don't even have to be annoyed that Batman would not be fighting a pirate. My kids also get to have space where I am not constantly complaining to them about how they are using it. Let's be honest though, I really wasn't thinking about their happiness when I built these walls.  I am glad it worked out for them too, just mostly happy it worked out for me.

I am my own person for a few minutes and that feels good.  We built a few walls around a space and now I feel like I can function without tripping over my children at every turn, priceless.  Now, what the hell am I going to do with all these thoughts about my own life?  Maybe I'll just focus on decorating the playroom for a while...and push out a few tears to encourage Alex to want to spend money on all the adorable ideas I have for it.  Fantastic.

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